The Gift of Fear

A security specialist, Gavin De Becker argues that gut instinct is often the most reliable protection against danger and that people should learn to trust it. Drawing patterns from accounts of violence and abuse, he shows how predictable violence can be in settings including the workplace, the home, school and dating. De Becker describes pre-incident indicators, behaviors that tend to precede violence, among them forced teaming, charm and niceness, too many details, the unsolicited promise and refusing to accept no. He also gives advice on restraining orders and self-defense, and describes his MOSAIC threat assessment systems, used by celebrities and government agencies. Published in 1997, it remained a New York Times best seller for 16 weeks.

David Heinemeier Hansson noted its accounts of victims who sensed danger but suppressed the instinct for fear of seeming rude, along with its frameworks for assessing threats. Ramit Sethi included it in his list of 50 books he recommends.